NY- The Empire State- Join the Dark Side
recently i've been relatively morbid and pessimistic.
the whole deal with my car has stressed me out beyond belief. not to mention life and the whole being adult bit in general. i am weary. from the inside out.
i find myself deeply despising people (we're talking a complete and total hatred that i didn't know i was capable of) tailgating me at 8 in the morning before i've even had time to finish my cup of coffee. and i'm not a slow driver. unless there are slow people in front of me, and since my recent accidents, i've learned to deal with them better and give them the space they need. pleading with God to let laser beams come out of my eyes.
i've noticed myself holding my tongue more and more often so i don't offend someone i wish would talk faster because i really don't have time for their crap. and i wish the freaking toll booth lady would get off her freaking cell phone so she won't screw up the flow. doesn't she know that she's supposed to be working?
I have become the stereotypical New Yorker. Move faster, talk faster, eat on the go, keep moving. i find it more and more difficult to be still. i get anxious.
there's so much that needs to be done: cleaning and errands and banking and buying stamps and dusting and practicing and mending socks and hemming pants and eating breakfast and being here and being there and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and getting the mail and paying the bills and eating dinner, wait making dinner, doing dishes taking out garbage should i recycle? oh, to hell with it, no time to sort the crap.
i think i have a problem. it's quite possible i am ever so slightly obsessive compulsive. i realized that if certain things aren't done when i get home from whereever, it is impossible for me to relax. really relax.
so today i decided to try and relax. it was a beautiful day! i went outside to take a walk and took a deep breath of the pollen filled, polluted air and wouldn't you know it started to sneeze. so i came back inside and cleaned a dirty recliner, then the bathroom, then the hall closet, then the kitchen................
the whole deal with my car has stressed me out beyond belief. not to mention life and the whole being adult bit in general. i am weary. from the inside out.
i find myself deeply despising people (we're talking a complete and total hatred that i didn't know i was capable of) tailgating me at 8 in the morning before i've even had time to finish my cup of coffee. and i'm not a slow driver. unless there are slow people in front of me, and since my recent accidents, i've learned to deal with them better and give them the space they need. pleading with God to let laser beams come out of my eyes.
i've noticed myself holding my tongue more and more often so i don't offend someone i wish would talk faster because i really don't have time for their crap. and i wish the freaking toll booth lady would get off her freaking cell phone so she won't screw up the flow. doesn't she know that she's supposed to be working?
I have become the stereotypical New Yorker. Move faster, talk faster, eat on the go, keep moving. i find it more and more difficult to be still. i get anxious.
there's so much that needs to be done: cleaning and errands and banking and buying stamps and dusting and practicing and mending socks and hemming pants and eating breakfast and being here and being there and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and getting the mail and paying the bills and eating dinner, wait making dinner, doing dishes taking out garbage should i recycle? oh, to hell with it, no time to sort the crap.
i think i have a problem. it's quite possible i am ever so slightly obsessive compulsive. i realized that if certain things aren't done when i get home from whereever, it is impossible for me to relax. really relax.
so today i decided to try and relax. it was a beautiful day! i went outside to take a walk and took a deep breath of the pollen filled, polluted air and wouldn't you know it started to sneeze. so i came back inside and cleaned a dirty recliner, then the bathroom, then the hall closet, then the kitchen................
posted by shannon. at 9:29 PM
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